This morning I woke with a start. Yannick’s alarm was set for 4:30am, an alarm I didn’t hear go off, because I wear heavy duty earplugs, thanks to his snoring, and what I’m assuming, that thanks to aging, is my newly acquired habit too. None the less, I didn’t hear it. Yet for some strange unknown reason to me, I literally jumped to attention at 5:30 am. You know winter is coming because it was pitch black in our room, so I had to do the pat, pat, feel for his body next to me in the bed. He was gone. No body. Due to how dark it was I thought he might just be in the bathroom, but when there was no movement of re-entry into the bed, I rolled over to check his alarm clock. 5:30am. Which meant he wasn’t peeing, he was long gone.
I tossed back and forth contemplating getting up, or grabbing just a couple more hours of sleep. He would never know if I had or hadn’t, so why was I feeling incredibly guilty. Trying to shake off my guilt, I did all my breath exercises, laid in a meditative, relaxed position and willed myself to fall back to sleep. It never happened; mostly because I’m trying to figure out if this super groovy idea I have for an app/website is actually plausible. Which meant my brain was way more interested in getting up, and doing research on the matter. Problem is, our WIFI is on a timer, it shuts off at 11pm and doesn’t come back on until 7am. This made doing any web research impossible. Knowing I wouldn’t get any work done, even if I did get up in the pitch black of winter is coming morning, what did I do? I laid there for another twenty minutes begging my body, and mind, to go back to sleep. Eventually the fact that I have two months of month end to itemize for my accountant, my excitement at trying to get to the bottom of my idea, along with wanting to do a thirty minute meditation, fit in a forty-five minute cardio session all before a meeting I have at Camp Ooch at 12pm; I figured getting up would help tick some of these tasks off my list.
I wandered downstairs, snuggled dogs, who were not the least bit interested in me, but what the hell, I cozied up to them anyway. Made lemon water, some tea, did my mediation, and when that was done my WIFI was on enabling me to get researching. Then I became distracted, as I’m prone to doing. I began reading articles on how religious people are feeling that they’re “values” are being attacked in this modern world. Which by the way, in case you’re wondering has absolutely NOTHING to do with my app/website idea. This will give you an indication of just how off the track I was, but it did provide today’s post, so not all is wasted.
The articles really made me go “hmmm.” You see I just don’t get it. I don’t get how what I believe, is an attack against what you believe? For example, I really believe with all my heart, that Angelina and Brad should totally work their shit out and stay together. They clearly disagree. Am I going to write to them? Am I going to try to make a law that forces them to stay together? No. No I am not, because that is just dumb, and won’t change matters anyway. I also don’t understand how the way I choose to live my life, has any impact on yours? Unless of course, I’m a rage filled person, hitting innocent motorists with water bottles, or stop signs, then absolutely my choices have a negative impact on your life. But otherwise, how? Explain to me precisely how?
Let’s break this down: if what I believe, and how I live isn’t in keeping with what you believe, or how you live, how is what I’m doing “attacking” your values??? It doesn’t even compute. Like, at all. I for one, as a parent didn’t take, or allow our girls to watch violent films, or play video games. For me, I didn’t think they represented “natural human behavior” that I wanted our girls to be conditioned into thinking was “normal.” On the other hand, we did take them to romantic comedy films that often had at least some sexual innuendo, a love scene, or light nudity in them. Why did we allow that? Well because love, sex, nudity are all “normal” aspects of being a human being, whereas killing happens, but let’s be honest, it’s not what we would consider “normal.” Well, at least not what I consider “normal.” We had plenty of friends who allowed their kids to grow up on a steady stream of violent films, and video games, and you know what? We still hung out with them. We still loved them, and didn’t judge them. That was their choice, and our choice was ours; live and let live. It truly works beautifully.
There was another article about the loss of “normal families.” Oh really? “Normal.” Here’s that word again! What the hell do we consider “normal” anyway? What I think “normal” is, is that children grow up in a home, where two people love one another, who treat one another with respect, who share the same standard on how to raise their family. That’s “normal.” Whether these people be two men, two women, a man and a woman, a woman and a grandmother, a man alone, a woman alone. Who the fuck actually cares how a family is built, as long as it is built with love, and respect. Isn’t that what we should all be worrying about? I mean, I’ve known plenty of “normal families” to be riddled with alcoholism, abuse, infidelity, and bitterness. But they were male, female, so they were “normal.” Fuck that. Let it go people. Your life works for you. My life works for me. Your life bears no ill on mine, or negative impact either. Nor does mine to yours.
And it always brings me back to this final point: if you believe that your God is almighty, and if you know in your hearts that there is a judgement day coming, and we will all stand before Him, and answer to Him. Then relax. Enjoy your values. Live in peace and harmony knowing that you “got this” and the rest of us, in your loving, humble opinion, do not. Be at peace with all of mankind, and trust me, when you really live in this confidence about your God, nothing anybody else is doing with their lives can shake your foundation.
Can I get an Amen?